If she loses one of her legs, she can strap a dildo to the stump and call it her peg leg.
That’s kinda… wholesome
First class problem solving!
But I poop from there
Not right now you don’t
Afterwards it comes out as milkshake.
Is this what they song meant about “milkshake bringing all the boys to the yard”? Is it really a Dommy Mommy anthem?
Poopin’ that D!
this one hits a little harder bc she’s a lookalike to my first gf.
Not sure who this is but they look like Daisy Ridley to me.
Is her attitude similar?
not hardly. she wouldn’t even do it in her parents’ hot tub.
Eehhhh we just broke up and my ass is going un-pegged for too long…
If I can trust the internet, the world is full of opportunities.
I mean siblings and step mothers and fathers and you know what I mean…
Loool yeah, guess i just have to get stuck in the washing machine and some step family member ive never met will “help me”
Alright, hear me out: You’re washing your strap-on in the kitchen sink, and it’s prominently drying on the counter when you get stuck trying to get something out of the dishwasher!
It’d be madness if no one took advantage of this opportunity!
Apes together strong. This is how you brainstorm as a team.
Apestorm! APE! STORM!!!
Or they’d tell you to get high and peg yourself
/c/selfposted
Okay, I do the first step, what now?
Boyfriend: “I want more adventurous sex!”
Girlfriend: “Great, will you help me with the laundry and the dishes first?”
I don’t fold the laundry because I want to have sex with her.
I fold the laundry because I’m the other adult in this house, therefore I take on the adult tasks, and when she isn’t worn out from doing all the housework herself, she has sex with me.
I don’t fold the laundry because I want to have sex with her.
I fold the laundry because I’m the other adult in this house
Demonstrating maturity and relieving your partner of household chores leaves more opportunity for intimacy
Yeah, you like that? You like when I act like a functional adult?
😘
Transactional sex is not worth it. Both should take care of chores, and both should want sex for its own sake.
It’s nice to have sex in a house that feels clean and on bedsheets that aren’t soiled.
yet
might as well wait until after to wash the linens.
Both should take care of chores,
If they are both working, right? Right?
Whether they are or not. Clean up after yourself.
I’m designing a Roomba strong enough to support two people sitting on it for this very reason. There is a way to satisfy everyone.
Hey baby. You, me, and the roomba. How about it?
The roomba boomba
cool sign
mommy
