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Joined 29 days ago
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Cake day: June 6th, 2026

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  • It’s layered.

    At the base level it’s just a mix of a kind of old tv static and what sounds like a creek bubbling. It’s the pre-verbalization soup- textured with sub-thoughts, half-impulses, emotional currents. It’s noticeable background noise but not particularly loud.

    Above that is another layer of multiple streams of wordage. Just kind of nonsensical whispers that flow around non-stop. Sometimes there are also impressions of images but nothing definitive. Emotional tones are strongest here.

    Above that is the focused wordage, or the internal monologue. Usually it’s proposed point or observation by one “me” and counter-point or add-on by another “me”. There’s no set number of "me"s. Occasionally it’s a construct of some other people I know. Just tangential rambling in incomplete sentences mostly unless I am really trying to sort something out, then it’s more structured. There’s a part of my mind that seems to calculate the conclusion to what I am mentally verbalizing that is one step ahead of the words so often there isn’t a need to complete a thought. This is also where the music and images play.

    There is one more layer above all that, the working space, when I really focus, all the other layers fade from consciousness, words are clear, sharp, and coherent and the back-and-forth feels more like a unified “me”, it’s also where I deliberately create and manipulate mental images, movies, concoct scenarios and music plays the clearest.








  • “There was such a potential for all of us to live brilliant, flourishing, fulfilling lives.”

    No there wasn’t. That’s just part of the illusion they sell you. The entire thing is just a shakey extension into the sky built upon a foundation it continues to havest from to give the impression of growth. It was only great for a few of us and it could never last.

    I do agree with your sentiment and feel like if humans weren’t the way we are we could still build a global paradise.

    But that’s not the way humans operate.





  • People are inherently stupid. It is an essential part of our species for a reason that’s clever by no merit of our own. That reason is because fitting into social structure takes precedent over everything else. Without it being the highest priority, we are exiled from the goup which historically has spelled death and the end of our family line.

    Above all we are a social animal. Of all traits, it is the entirety of our strength and survivability as a species. We believe what we are told to believe by people we believe. That’s it. The adaptability of our world modeling systems is remarkable and the vast influx of environmental data is ambiguous at best.

    From the moment you are pooped out onto the earth to the moment you sink into its chilly clutches, all of us, from the beginning of humankind, believe only what our socialization allows us to believe.

    Except for the very few things you’ve objectively tested with rigor, everything you think you know falls within the category of second hand knowledge by trusting that certain people are telling you the truth.

    Conversely, logical deduction, mathematics, statistics, etc., etc., are not natural to our instincts. They’re skills that must be learned.

    So just remember that. You, me, and the vast sea of morons that cover this planet are inherently built for fucking, hunting for resources, and being an integral part of our in-group way beyond things like understanding long term cause and effect, objective analysis, or anything else that paints a somewhat clearer picture of reality.



  • Now this is ironic.

    Reading post: “Hey, I have that game! Wouldn’t it be funny if I took a picture of it and wrote something like ‘oh, it’s over here’.”

    goes to xbox stash

    “Hmm, that’s weird, it’s gone.”

    It was pretty fun. Plot was kind of convoluted. Think I only played it all the way through once but it had a good feel, the upgrades were neat, and it looked great. I probably bought it used and there was a scratch that caused a glitch at one of the boss fights which deterred me from finishing it for a long time but at some point I finished it.