The Sword of Truth series.

I read the first book as a teenager. I was rather skeezed out by the roughly one-third of the book that was a poorly-disguised authorial kink fantasy.

Then the second book had a lovingly detailed description of a witch gaining demonic power by getting railed by a demon.

Snow Falling on Cedars by David Guterson

Shadow Moon, the sequel to the movie Willow, written by Chris Claremont and George Lucas was hot shit. I couldn’t finish the 2nd book in the trilogy.

Silas Marner was so hated by my English class our teacher cried. It turns out it was what she wrote her master’s thesis on and no one agreed with her about it being good.

You guys have never experienced JOHN RINGO.

The first book opens with Osama Bin Laden and the leader of Iran hatching a plot to kidnap sexy American coeds to rape and torture.

It then switches to the POV of our hero, a former SEAL who left the army due to his arthritis and has now enrolled in college. He is stalking a female student from his class whom he is thinking about raping, he lets the readers know that he is 100% a rapist and also that all these left-wing female students secretly desire to be raped by a strong conservative man.

But unfortunately for our hero, a white van pulls up and kidnaps the girl he was stalking right in front of him. Thinking quickly he follows the van and then ends up stowing away in the wheel well on an airplane that’s on it’s eay to Iran.

Long story short, he single-handedly rescues dozens of sexy coeds from the combined forces of al-queda and iran - killing Osama Bin Laden himself.

In the sequels, for which there are many, he travels to Georgia (the country not the state) and finds an isolated community descended from the Varangian Guard. These people recognize him as an alpha male and make him their leader The Kildar whoms job it is to lead them into battle and impregnate their daughters, most of whom are 14-18 year olds.

50 shades of grey. The writing was so cringe that I just couldn’t get further than one chapter or so. And I’ve read some bad writing on AO3 before, so it’s not like I’m especially sensitive.

The Book of Mormon. Someone literally paid me to read it. It is so glaringly obvious that it’s tall tales by Joseph Smith it hurt to read from the cringe. And it was so dark, too! Most memorably the section titled “Doctrine & Covenants.” In chapter 132, verse 54, Joseph says Emma Smith, his ninth wife, would be destroyed by god, and her entire family destroyed for good measure, if she refused to sleep with him.

I don’t understand how Mormons can be so gullible, and in believing all of it, how they can believe a deity that threatens women for refusing to sleep with a sexual predator can be a deity they want to worship. It makes me sad to think about.

Not recommended for me but I started looking at books that won the Nobel for literature. I tried reading Gunter Grass’ “The Tin Drum”. I’d seen a tv adaption of it previously and didn’t follow what was going on. When I tried reading it the entire first chapter was about a woman with her son roasting a potato in a field. Then the 2nd chapter went on about his uncle’s job. I couldn’t keep going. Maybe I’ll give it a 2nd chance.

I have a hard time following books that go on about huge family structures with endless aunts, uncles, siblings, etc. I feel like I need a chart next to me.

Three Body Problem

The Qur’an. It seems to assume the Bible is true and a real revelation and that it is a biblical commentary, despite clearly contradicting it in numerous places. It makes sense in the context that it came from an illiterate Bedouin paedophile from the 600s

I was in a horrible spot mourning for a close relative who had just hanged himself. I made the mistake of posting on Facebook and a friend from high school recommended “12 Rules for Life, an antidote to chaos”.

I was not in a good space and didn’t even look at the author before ordering it. When it arrived a few days later I only had to read the first page before realizing I’d been had. Jordan fucking Peterson. What a pile of shit that guy is.

Ready Player One.

I laughed my ass off starting on like page five. It was such a hate read, total hail corporate nostalgia bait slop. Never took the coworker who recommended it serious again.

Any self improvement or “gain x skill” book

The problem is I can actually name quite a few books I regret reading, but none of those were recommendations lol.

Most recommendations I’ve gotten are average, maybe a handful of mediocre, but nothing like “why did I waste my life on this?”

Regardless, here is a book (series) I think had to be a prank written as a joke submission that somehow got approved and somehow made enough money to make a complete series: https://www.scholastic.com/andygriffiths/chapter_butt_wars.htm

Seriously I want you to read the Scholastic excerpt and tell me with a straight face the writing wasn’t a bet to see if the publisher would pass anything if you slapped a fasade of a poop joke title onto a book.

I cannot emphasize this enough. This doesn’t read like a children’s humor book, it’s literally just a drunken action packed story that the author did a word substitute to see how far this could go lmao.

This is probably divisive here, but I just…do not care for Brandon Sanderson. As someone who has read a lot of fantasy before getting into him, he’s always praised for having a coherent magic system, but that isn’t really enough to make it an enjoyable fantasy story. There’s just a lack of… something in his writing (and I’ve tried to read Mistborn and his shorts) that I have a hard time quantifying to others.

Also I was really surprised that I found his writing weirdly bland in the same way I found Stephanie Meyer’s writing bland, considering that they write completely different genres. Then I found out they were both had Mormon upbringings, and I can kind of see why I found the blandness similar.