Good news everyone!
My heart has stopped a couple of times now… if nobody had actually told me, I never would have known. I have an implant that watches for that now.
Me, waking up in the hospital, fiddling around on my phone. Nurse comes in.
“Hey, were you asleep about an hour ago?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Your heart stopped for 8 seconds.”
“Um… ‘thank you’? I don’t know the correct response to ‘your heart stopped’. Wait, shouldn’t the alarms have gone off? I don’t remember hearing anything.”
“Oh, they go off at the nurses station.”
You could have answered:
“How do you know it wasn’t just beating at 8bpm?”
For context, normal resting is like 40-60
For context, normal resting is like 40-60
No it’s not. That’s a resting rate for athletes, which does not really fall under “normal”, normally that would be this: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bradycardia
It can be a pretty serious heart problem.
Would your heart stopping for eight seconds cause you to lose consciousness?
No, but sleeping would.
Pretty sure it would, or at least be close. The brain loses consciousness after 5 to 15 seconds without oxygen.
this is a heck of a motivation to live
Or is it motivation to die at the peak of your health?
or is it a motivation to make sure you go to hell?
Or is heaven hell?
Sounds like it could be. In drugged out bliss and thrall to a god in its domain. No change, no learning…nothing except stasis until the end of time.
At least in Christian theology, that’s not heaven. Heaven will generally be like earth but without the bad stuff.
Pity they’d rather set this Earth on fire in a rush to get to the next one.
Who are “they”
It always sounded awful. But I don’t even think it’s that, because as far as I’m concerned, if god is anything besides made up, there’s no way it doesn’t just slowly consume souls of the dead.
Easy food, just subsist off the faithful and keep the train going for thousands of years with infighting and a strong drive to proselytize non-believers. Some kind of cosmic horror shit or something, gotta be.
Edit: But to be clear, I’m not trying to imply anyone following this or other religions is wrong or anything, or that I actually believe this (I’m in the “it’s made up” camp), I just think cosmic horror is neat and love overthinking :3
Why would you need food if you are literaly infinite? Cmon, could even just spawn food.
so you think you can tell
Blue skies from pain
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
But if heaven is so bad already I would wonder how more terrible hell would be.
Live fast, die young, and leave a beautiful corpse
You should say something else
if youre physically active every single day you will always be at the peak of your health
Neither de-age nor wear clothes
They also don’t have internet. Enjoy shitposting while you can!
Is this the bad place?
We need to get to the medium place like Mindy.
If that’s Heaven, I wonder what Hell is like.
In hell, you never, ever get to know what your grandparents looked like naked. Even if they’re there. Even if you ask. Doesn’t matter. Answer is no.
The finale of Martyrscome to mind.
This comic sucks…
