WideEyedStupid

That’s funny. I’ve only ever known 2 of them personally and they have all of it. The whole damn package. Yeah, that wasn’t fun.

Data show that, unlike normative, healthy self-esteem, which is associated with positive outcomes (5–7), narcissistic self-esteem is fragile, because it is highly contingent on achievement-related successes and feedback from the social environment (13–15). Narcissistic self-esteem is thus conceptualized as precariously elevated. When an individual with NPD is faced with an ego threat (e.g., real or imagined criticism, failure, or reduced social regard), unrealistically high self-expectations crumple into perceived inferiority (16, 17). Individuals with NPD are, therefore, hypersensitive to ego threats, and when threatened, they respond with efforts to reduce concomitant distress and upregulate self-esteem (17–19). These regulation strategies include some of NPD’s most recognizable and maladaptive behaviors. Classic “grandiose” responses include being aggressive or devaluing toward others (20, 21), fixating on grandiose fantasies (22), or engaging in self-serving bias (23). Classic “vulnerable” responses include alienating and isolating themselves (24) by avoiding situations that may threaten self-esteem (25), relentlessly criticizing themselves (26–28), or engaging in suicidal behaviors and fantasies (29, 30). This vacillation between overly inflated and deflated self-appraisals, alongside efforts to regulate this unstable sense of self through grandiosity, flawlessness, and/or avoidance, are described in both early psychoanalytic theories of narcissism (31), the contemporary Alternative DSM-5 Model for Personality Disorders (8), and the personality disorder section of the ICD-11 (32–34). It is important to note that research is continually adding nuance to scientific perspectives on self-esteem in NPD (35). Various frameworks differently emphasize shifts between distinct states of grandiosity (i.e., elevated self-esteem, arrogance, and entitlement) and vulnerability (i.e., shame, insecurity, and neuroticism). Scholars are working to clarify whether and how grandiosity may function to conceal ever-present vulnerability and whether fragile self-esteem is a driving force or an outcome of this process (17, 18, 26, 36).

Source.

So. I guess it’s not actually clear yet which one of us is right (whether it’s ever-present or not).

All I can say is that in my (limited) experience they have extreme reactions to any sort of criticism, they take almost everything personal, and this just doesn’t happen with people who are actually really self-confident. I know plenty of confident people and they can handle criticism just fine without throwing huge fucking temper tantrums. It came to a point where I was walking on eggshells trying to never say anything that could be interpreted as criticism, because their fragile ego couldn’t handle it and they’d turn it around on me. Like… trying to make themselves feel better by putting me down. Anyway, I’ll stop dragging my personal issues in here, and just say: perhaps some day we’ll have a definitive answer.

Edit: typo.

Not sure why you’re getting downvoted. You’re right.

Yes and that need stems from deep insecurity. Narcissists are insecure, but don’t show it. Their whole superiority act is just that, an act. Very convincing, because it’s what they -want- to be, and when people praise them it’s like a confirmation. They’re addicted to it. That’s why they lash out at anyone who sees through it. When you praise them, they’ll treat you like the best friend/lover they’ve ever had, but once you take away the praise… well they become a nightmare.

See it like this: nobody who is actually self-confident needs to get a constant stream of praise to be happy.

Ah, yes, BG3. I’ve spent way too many hours on that game already, figured I should replay some other games. Still probably will go back to it though, it’s just so good. Hadn’t heard of Beyond All Reason, but it does look interesting. I see it’s pvp RTS, yes? Pvp is not my thing, but a solo campaign would be nice.

And that video, yeah, I certainly understand that people want to know these things, different outcomes and dialogue, because I do too, it’s the reason I love RPG’s so much, but you see that’s the thing: I do it myself. I already played the Witcher multiple times and did everything in different orders. I’ve played Mass Effect more times than I care to admit and make different choices each time. Doing missions in different orders, or not doing certain missions at all. Letting different people die, making different companions loyal, different romances, paragon/renegade decisions, etc. Same goes for BG3 and Dragon Age and Divinity:OS/2, etc. Any game I enjoy enough to replay, I’ll replay in different ways and it’s so awesome to play a game for the umpteenth time and still find things you haven’t seen before. So I’d prefer no spoilers. I’ll cheat sometimes and just try something out of curiosity, then afterwards I reload. Or I change plot flags. Ha, but most people probably don’t want to spend the time on it and videos are a lot less time-consuming.

Hmm, well, I recently finished a playthrough of Mass Effect, N7 day every year, hm? Before that it was Dragon Age, mostly due to the release of Veilguard. Sadly that game is apparently so terrible that I’ll probably never play it. Some of my friends already regret buying it and sent me clips of the atrocious dialogue. At the very least it’ll have to be 80% off if I ever try it, lol.

Been replaying a lot, The Witcher 3, Disco Elysium, Divinity:OS2. Early this year I did a Fallout 4 playthrough with all chapters of Sim Settlement 2 installed. Lucky too, that I got to play the entire story before the update hit and ruined my game. I don’t think even half of my mods work anymore, so thanks, Bethesda, for Skyrimming Fallout 4.

Really I’m just waiting for KCD to release, somewhere in February next year, so I’ll probably be replaying KCD. Also on a rewatch of The Wire at the moment and almost done reading the Culture series by Banks.

Guess I just love stories.

Anything good you’ve played recently? Or watched being played? ;)

I’m starting to think that maybe I’m just really boring. In those situations you describe I’m usually just reading, or maybe watching series.

Isn’t that game some sort of theme park simulator? I agree it sounds weird to get a highscore with just a swimming pool. :p

Yeah, you make sense. I’m not really a multiplayer or competitive game player at all, that’s probably why. Single player all the way (though if I could go back to early years Ragnarok Online I would without a second thought :p). Not really a sports person either, rooting for teams and such, meh. Guess it’s just not really my thing at all. It happens. Or I haven’t found the thing I might like yet, could be.

But for the people who like this stuff, they’ll never run out of content, plenty of videos and streamers everywhere. That’s gotta be nice.

Same. I never watch other people playing games, or sports for that matter, with LoL Worlds being the exception, which might be a little weird because I don’t even play it myself. I’ll usually watch the knock-out stage. My husband watches the entire thing, but that’s a bit too much for me.

Anyway, yeah why would I watch someone else play a game when I can just play it myself? For games I haven’t played yet, I would spoiler it for myself. Games I’ve already played… well, don’t need to watch that anymore, right?

I know many people watch/listen to that stuff in the background, while doing other things, but my background is for music. ;)