Single guy here, I love beer. And whiskey.

Lacto pickle juice is God tier at killing a hangover. Don’t waste your money and life on vinegar pickles. You need proper authentic bubbie pickles BUT that shit absolutely slaps after a heavy night on the town.

Some mornings you’ll do more shots of pickle juice than liquor the night prior. That’s good!

Thank me later. Learn to lacto ferment vegetables and you’ll never nurse a hangover again.

Piss in the shower

• Makes the mango taste better

I hide them in my foreskin. WAY more flattering.

The Moon is 384,400 km away from Earth. If you took every elephant on Earth and stacked them one atop another most of them would die.

What are you doing stepsyrup?!

As a teenager my buddy’s mom told us a joke.

What does NASA stand for?

Needs Another Seven Astronauts

They mass produce Wagyu cattle and yet aren’t famous for their steak. (Their Wagyu is my favourite beef too)

I’m not hating or rage bait, I truly believe in their chefs. I want them to get creative.

It’s a viable placeholder until Australia produces a cuisine good enough.

Has anyone ever said “Hey babe let’s go to the Australian restaurant tonight”

I don’t think Australians even say that.

Soap tastes bitter. I’ll pass. I want natural bean.

Crispy for her disgust.

Hence me exercising extreme discipline for when the news arrives😎

I’ll happily turn it into urine then.

Wouldn’t you be?

I cannot enjoy rye whiskey at all. I’ll tolerate scotch or Irish but I’m a bourbon man through and through. I have an unopened bottle of pre-Trump Woodford waiting for that glorious day.

Reported.

Classic dilemma

Every once in a while I’ll say something completely incorrect so she talks science to me.

Stahp it step preacher I can only get so turgid

I’ve dunked half my hand in an active deep fryer before. I was 19.

I knew what I was doing so it was all coordinated, into the oil, grab the item, pivot 180 directly to the sink and cold water for a couple minutes.

Lightening fast. Barely had first degree burns. Was perfectly functional the next day.

It’s one of the stupidest things I’ve ever done, I doubt I could ever pull it off again. NEVER TRY THIS.

Almost 20 years later I have no idea how I walked away from that intact.

Have you considered it is not the dish but perhaps your greasy sausage fingers?

Food for thought.