In my experience with TF2, many popular community servers have common-sense rules like no slurs, cheats, etc. The great thing about a player-run server is that, if you want, it can be stricter than official guidelines, as Valve for example is pretty hands-off beyond the obvious in-game cheats. It allows pockets of the community to shape the experience they want to have more adeptly than official servers ever could.

If you want to try an FPS, the original Half-Life is amazing (if visually dated), and was designed to ease the player into the experience as opposed to something like Doom or Dusk that throws you into the action without any tutorials. I’m biased though, Half-Life is my favorite FPS of all time lol.

It goes on sale for around $2 regularly, which is a nice bonus. I second the Portal and Stardew recommendations of others too.