Please don’t tell me “see a therapist” I know that already.
Agree with her. Then say all these old and retired people aren’t contributing to the economy anymore and don’t deserve to live. Then you ask her how old she is, for effect.
And specifically ask her, at which age or milestone does she think it’s not worth to keep her alive anymore? You can suggest the point where she retires.
And if she says something like “well old people did contribute so much in the past”, just say that so did depressed people and often they are depressed because of giving more than they had.
Or maybe agree with her and drive it to the ultimate conclusion: people with disabilities will need to be euthanized if they can’t contribute. Working accident and you lost a limb or two? Euthanization.
Remind her to update her living will to let her die in case of an accident causing severe disabilities.
Laziness dosnt exist, its just how we shame people into doing what we want and everyone is doing there best.
The first part is a new concept to me. Theres a book on it and the concept is pretty interesting. The latter too but I still get hung up on that one.
Both have helped me to understand I have my limits and that’s ok.
But yeah. What is lazy. I mean most people don’t want to live in <insert whatever ia being called lazy> situation. They literally can’t get out of the rut for otjer reasons, just “wanting to” or “being productive” dosnt fix the underlying cause.
Other option, Louis Theroux that shit
Just don’t react, but keep asking “why” type questions, again, just acting interested, like you think they could convince you if they’re just explain it better.
Make them try to argue their own way into a hole until they’re either so pissed off they drop it, or they start to disbelief their own thoughts.
It works cause you’re not arguing against stupid that way, you’re making stupid argue against itself, and nothing beats that
Depression is a luxury of human social bonds, modern safety, and excess. Without that, yes, you get too lazy or too low “value” and Darwin gets you. But that’s pretty archaic thinking that doesn’t really apply to modern society.
my rebuttal would be to cut her entirely out of my life.
Your mom’s a cunt.
Woah, hey now. I doubt she’s got the depth or the warmth to be called that!
My rebuttal is that your mom’s a bitch and there’s no reason to pay attention to anything she says.
Damn right.
Right? If I had a mom like that I’d be depressed too.
Oh wait, I did, and I was.
Confirmed. Tagged this person before, I’ve noticed they often comment about some fucked up shit their mom says. But they’re young and probably not able to escape it yet unfortunately :/
She’s giving you the most difficult life lesson. I am almost 40 and to this day I dread to ‘actively hear’ many words my dad has to say about me or my decisions. It’s a difficult lesson because they are our caregivers and as such they did many good deeds. But at some point we need to put our own mental health above anyone else’s rant, rage, or toxicity. We don’t owe them shit. After that leap, you may be able to come back to the issue that they were addressing with their comments and reflect upon the issue itself on your own and/ or with the help of others (friends, therapist, chatgpt?? I wouldn’t recommend the latter but it may be a good starting point and better than nothing…)
“ok boomer”
There is no teaching those who have no interest in learning.
Ask your mother what societal value retirees provide, and then ask her where you should dump her once she retires.
Why rebut it? You aren’t going to use logic to argue someone out of a position they didn’t use logic to get to. Especially someone that probably thinks you owe them your existence. You’ll never win that argument, don’t ask me how I know.
If you’re still living at home, make it priority to determine a way to make it on your own ASAP, or be prepared to eat shit until you figure that out.
Ask her what “value” is.
She’s utterly wrong. Take Robin Williams as an example: he was famous, rich, loved by everybody, stupendously funny. Still had depression. Still suffered.
It has nothing to do with people’s “value” or their work ethic.
Iirc part of the reason he killed himself was because he had a very aggressive form of dementia.
Yea, but that conflicts with the narrative that money and success can’t insulate you from depression and that everyone is secretly struggling exactly the same; so people have chosen to ignore that part.
From Wikipedia, the fourth para from top:
During his final years, Williams struggled with severe depression before his death from suicide in 2014 at his Paradise Cay, California, home at age 63. According to his widow, Williams had been diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease, and had been experiencing depression, anxiety, and increasing paranoia.
Note the article listed as the source for that statement, and its title: Robin Williams’ widow speaks: Depression didn’t kill my husband. As she eloquently puts it,
Comedian Robin Williams’ widow, Susan Williams, said she and her husband “were living a nightmare” in the months leading up to his death.
“My best friend was sinking,” an emotional Williams told ABC’s Amy Robach in an interview that aired Tuesday, her first since Robin Williams killed himself in August 2014.
Williams said she’s spent the last year trying to get to the bottom of what led him to take his own life. Contrary to what most people think, she said, it wasn’t depression, nor was it a re-emergence of his longtime struggles with alcohol and drug addiction.
She never said her husband had no depression; quite the contrary. What she said was that depression didn’t kill him.
Neurological disorders (such as various forms of dementia) and depression go hand in hand; it could even be said that clinical depression, being a dysregulation of the neurotransmitters that control mood, is a neurological disorder itself.
I don’t want to get into the weeds with the medical nomenclature of depression, just because there has rarely been a time when it was not disputed. But the lived experience of dementia and its frequent accompanying depression can’t be separated. You’re just demonstrating your lack of knowledge of both and, it could be added, a serious lack of compassion here.
EDITED to add link
He had Lewy Body Dementia, which is a horrific disease. That’s why he killed himself. Not depression. Look into what it’s like to experience that disease, and you would probably want to kill yourself also.
I wrote a longer comment above, but you should know that the symptom of actual clinical depression is present in many neurological disorders, including Lewy Body Dementia: when both are present they cannot be separated.
But what you say is absolutely true: the disease is beyond horrible.
“Guess I’ll kill myself”
I don’t think she takes my suicide threats seriously, she think I’m joking. That I’m “seeking attention”
Every time that philosophy has been implemented it has resulted in mass death and social collapse. Meanwhile when “useless” people are given tools and resources some of them wind up less useless.
Isaac Newton was probably autistic with bad enough social skills he was generally despised. Stephen Hawking had ALS. There are cultures who would have declared both of them useless and unfit for life. Hell Hellen Keller was an author and important political activist (cofounder of the ACLU) despite being deaf blind, because people gave her a chance and worked with her to learn a form of communication that worked for her.
Jesus fucking christ mom. I would ask her to evaluate her contributions to society and really dissect if she ever did anything meaningful in the past or present. Then usher her towards the nearest woodchopper and let her know its time to serve a real purpose.
