My wife now knows not to insist on pure cranberry juice, but rather to request a 100% juice blend and not “cocktail” (the cocktail is what the juice blend goes in). I finished the battery acid myself over the course of a few weeks, out of pure Floridaman cussedness. It was not pleasant.
It should be sold in chemical supply houses, or maybe restaurant supply houses, but at any rate, it needs to come in a white bottle with black letters and be sold from something called a “supply house.”
It turns out there’s a newer category that still does the apple and white grape juice, but only that, not the high fructose corn syrup and water from Cranberry Juice Cocktail. I believe the blend is done to skew it more cranberryish as well. That’s apparently what my wife was thinking of.